A collection of some of the silly, bizarre and outrageous antics from the people elected to govern the rest of us.
As we near the culmination of three years of cannabis legalization creation, debate and implementation, I thought it might be fun to take a look back at the hilariously predictable comedy of politicians and police chiefs discussing something they are willfully ignorant about and pretending they were the new experts. The thinking must be that if an office mail-boy and a high school drama teacher are qualified to run a country, they can do anything.
I’ve written about a few examples on previous stories, so you may have seen some before – but you can’t get too much of politicians making fools of themselves…it’s comedy gold. It’ll be fun to remind your civic, provincial or federal representative of their comments, actions and laws the next time you vote.
Let’s start with one of my favorite comedians, Conservative MP from Sarnia – Lambton, Ontario, Marilyn Gladu. Marilyn is a vocal opponent of cannabis legalization (although I doubt her constituents support her position.) She is also a treasure chest of comedic material.
Some of you may be familiar with her anti-cannabis poem that she embarrassing read aloud in the House of Commons. If you missed it, you can find it on this very site under the title “Gladu Poem” as well as my satirical response poem. Highly recommended reading, but I will quote a few of the funnier lines as a teaser.
“With drug-impaired driving and challenges there,
The doubling of traffic deaths and Liberals don’t care,”
Here we have a representative of a large constituency predicting a doubling of traffic deaths, while completely ignoring the fact that there are no traffic deaths attributed to cannabis. If cannabis was present, so was another intoxicant. The usual impairment was caused by alcohol. She was also unable to produce any statistics relating to cannabis impaired driving as being a public safety issue.
“We hope that the Senate will do its true deed,
And keep our great country safe from all the weed.”
Here we have a recurring theme among the detractors of legal weed. I really need to wrap my head around the crazy reality that the people who are making rules for the rest of us, are convinced that cannabis is a brand new invention. I’ve never met any Canadian of any age who couldn’t find a bag of bud when they wanted one in the 40 years that I’ve been toking, but somehow all hell is going to break loose on October 17th? Reefer-madness lives on in 2018!
A more recent Gladu HoC outburst occurred in June of this year. You really, really need to watch the video for full comedic effect (available here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bldTkv4RDUs), but here are a few teasers.
“We have already established that this legislation would put marijuana in the hands of children, not just with the 15 joints that 12-year-olds can have but with the with the 4 plants per household, that little Johnny can go put some in the toaster oven and smoke it up”
You can’t make this stuff up! Even some of her own party members cringed at that stupidity.
Firstly, like alcohol and cigarettes, cannabis possession for minors remains an offence. The 15 joints she referred to was the 5g limit that determines whether the penalty is a fine or a criminal charge. One joint will get a 15 year old a criminal record today and none of us thinks sticking a record on a kid for weed is a good idea for anyone – except Marilyn.
But Marilyn wasn’t done, not by a long shot. What better way for someone completely void of any cannabis facts to embarrass herself and her constituents than to start a racially charged and absolutely baseless accusation resulting in an international incident with Mexico. While arguing in the House against home grows, she lets out this doozy:
“By the way, the government also eliminated the visa requirements for people coming in from Mexico, so lots of experienced people could just move in and take over the whole thing.”
“Now, they don’t know who’s coming in,” Gladu said in the interview. “Certainly, everyone has seen too many movies with drug cartels but it’s rife in Mexico.”
Classy woman. But wait, I have more. Around the same time as the Mexico and toaster oven weed bombshells,Marilyn Gladu was angry that she could not dictate what you choose to wear on your clothing. so we got this gem:
“One of the amendments that they did not accept had to do with the banning of promotional things like T-shirts, caps, and flags that would have a cannabis symbol on them. The government did not accept this amendment from the Senate. I am very concerned about that.
There are a lot of Canadians out there who are worried that when marijuana is legalized in Canada they are going to use Canada Day flags that have cannabis on them. Everybody will have a T-shirt with cannabis on it. That will be disgusting. It will absolutely denigrate our country and the people who have served our country and made Canada a proud country. It will deface that. The government has allowed people to continue to have that kind of paraphernalia by refusing the language here. It is total hypocrisy because under Bill S-228, which talks about prohibiting unhealthy advertising to children, we would not want to see pop or something like that on a T-shirt or a flag. However, with cannabis, it is okay. I am totally opposed to that.”
Why is she concerned that I could have a t-shirt with a cannabis plant leaf pictured on it, is beyond me. Was she elected to choose our wardrobes? Bizarre. I am concerned about having someone with questionable connection to reality sitting as an MP.
So congratulations Marilyn Gladu for being Cannabis Candor’s first featured Stupid Politician and thank you for the wealth of rich material. Keep it up, I’ll be paying attention and update this page.
Now let’s hope the voters in Sarnia have been paying attention.